My CORE

I am currently editing bridals for possibly my last bride ever… it makes my heart swell a little.  The light was just luscious the day of the shoot. The bride looked gorgeous – she had her hair in an intricate up-do, and the dress was just perfect for her. I just really enjoyed it, but it made me a little sad.

Over the past few months, I have come to the conclusion that I need to stop photographing weddings… for the time being. I may start again in the future, but at this point, I can’t say for sure. It was a very hard decision. It took me about a year to finally give in to the Lord’s patient whispers that it is just not what He wants me to be doing right now. I am confident that He wants me as a partner on some better things. So it is bittersweet.

On the drive back from Tryon Palace in New Bern after shooting these bridals, I was really grappling with this decision. I was just praying to God, and I realized that in this decision I was making, I never actually verbalized this question and statement to Him, “What should I do? My eyes are on you.” (As Jehoshaphat asked in 2 Chronicles 10:12) I want to do what He has given me to do. One thing that came to my mind was how much I love encouraging people and showing people the beauty of their marriage and the reason they are getting married. That is the CORE reason why I wanted to do wedding photography in the first place. While all this was passing through my mind, the verse in Proverbs 5:18 “rejoice in the wife of your youth” came to my thoughts. I thought about how I kept telling my bride at the bridal session that her husband-to-be is going to just fall on his face when he sees her at the wedding. THAT’S IT! That’s it right there. That is what wedding photography needs to be all about – commemorating that day for the commitment and helping the couple to remember how much they are in love with one another. The wedding day is about rejoicing in that beauty, and the wedding photography allows the couple to go and look back at what they looked like when they fell in love and made it permanent – not just the hair, make-up and dress, but the emotions – the look in each other’s eyes.

As I was praying, the sun was setting, and I was just telling God all my thoughts, including how much I love sunsets.  And then this rainbow appears out from behind the pine trees along the highway. It was so strange because there was no rain – it was a clear day with a few cumulous clouds. The sky was just brilliant with color. The rainbow was just a solid circle of rainbow color. What an awesome representation of God’s beauty in his creation!

And then I thought, “there is nothing more beautiful in God’s creation than people.” I mean we were made in God’s image, so we have to be the most beautiful, right? Think of a bride on her wedding day, a baby laughing, an elderly couple still just as much in love as their wedding day, a senior excited about her future…nothing more beautiful. This is why I love portrait photography to begin with.

I couldn’t get a photo of the actual rainbow, but this is the sunset. I couldn’t do it justice (while I was driving), but you get the idea. I had such a perfect time on this drive, hashing out how I was going to make this announcement. This is basically how the drive went. These are my prayers and thoughts. I encourage you to pray aloud if you are ever driving alone. God loves hearing our voices.

So you may be wondering how this helped with my decision. Well, it gave me peace. It reminded me that I love capturing all of life – I just love people. Besides, it is about seeking Him, and that’s what I’ve been doing all along. It confirmed that none of this was a mistake, but just part of the journey. Now, the part including wedding photography will end next month, and I can look to the future with excitement about focusing more on my own marriage and my kiddos.

What are you looking forward to this year?

PS – Look for these bridals April 6 in the afternoon!